One way to see deep rooted fears in the mind is to become aware of your reaction to those around you. Look and see what triggers cause you to feel angry or annoyed. What are the behaviour patterns in others that cause you to pull back from a person or try to avoid them completely? It is the traits we recoil from in others that hold the key to unconscious beliefs and fears.
It is also helpful to make a list of the things you like about yourself. If you are at low ebb, you may find it difficult to find anything positive about yourself. Make a list of qualities you wish to extend into the world and then set your intention to bring forth these qualities for everyone to see and enjoy.
The truth is you have all of these positive traits in you already but when you feel bad about yourself, particularly after a relationship breaks down; it can be difficult to appreciate the truly wonderful person that you are.
The need for something or someone to make you complete is at the root of suffering. You can be so fixated on getting what you think you need, you lose your connection to your Higher Self. The mental noise drags you along by setting out a list of rules and plans for your future. You get caught up in the drama of life, of what might or might not happen. Life becomes a stream of continuous questions and mind made scenarios of future probabilities.
Even when you reach a goal or receive something that you want, the mental noise soon replaces the satisfaction with the need for more; or the fear of losing what you have. The enjoyment is quickly replaced by the need for something else you think you need to be happy.
To end this destructive cycle it is very important to find a way to connect to your Higher Self. The intention to overcome this way of thinking is necessary to sever the destructive pattern caused by fear and desire.
Fear and desire are movements of the self centred ego and keep you locked into the illusory belief of being happy in the future. Like all ingrained beliefs, it takes constant practise to break its hold on the psyche. Keep repeating your intention to change and grow as a person.

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image: Brooke Shaden