Mindfulness is the art of being aware of your thoughts and observing them.

Initially this can be difficult to do because thoughts can be like a runaway train, depleting your energy. With daily practice you can begin to create awareness of your main thought patterns. By setting your intention to become mindful, you will become aware of the thoughts that negatively impact on your life experiences. What you consistently think about you bring about in your reality. When there is unawareness of thought patterns such as blame, judgement, self‑criticism; there will be a constant feeling of unhappiness and incompleteness.

After you break up with a partner, blame enters the arena. This may be self‑blame or projected blame. You may unconsciously beat yourself up about your perceived failure and inadequacies. The more dependent you are on a partner for security and well being, the more fear you experience at the thought of being alone. Acceptance of your vulnerability and setting your intention to find your inner strength is required to end the cycle of fear and dependency. Thoughts create experience; by planting new positive thoughts through affirmations you can begin to change your mind set. In this way you are taking responsibility for your life choices and experiences.

By affirming your intention for positive change in your thoughts, words and actions; you will evoke a higher vibration of feeling such as joy and love. Set your intention to feel joy in your Being. With this one intention, you can positively transform your life.

Set your intention to feel love. When you feel the sensation in your chest, allow it to be there and let it flow freely.

There is confusion that love and joy are states of mind when they are in fact states of well being. This state of well being attracts the mental patterns that allow positive life experiences. When you try to block the feeling of love then fear arises and the mental state takes over. A loving thought about your ex‑partner may arise and triggers a warm feeling. Immediately fear will remind you about the story and how hurt you feel. This will block the feeling of love being released.

As you start to become more aware of fear hijacking your expression of love, you can allow the feeling of love to be there without judgement. Allow the feeling of love to stand on its own without trying to identify the cause or the need for it to be returned. Fear is just a block to your experience of love.

Read more from ‘In Quest of Love‘ by Collette OMahony